Garry and Lisa Wedding
2nd September 2011

 Today is the day it’s finally come
Garry and Lisa they have become one

We’ve been waiting so long for them to be wed
Lets face it it’s a long time they’ve been sharing a bed

So to my brother what can I say
I’ve known him so long from his very first day

As brothers go he’s not been too bad
But rather than a brother you used to treat me like Dad

Peas in a pod we certainly aren’t that
In fact quite opposites like a dog and a cat

I think he’s adopted he really must be
He can’t have come from the same blood as me

I love Everton I’m a real football fan
He’d rather go fishing with the lads in his van

I once took him the match it seemed a good game
But Garry from the start did nothing but complain

Which side he was supporting I don’t think he knew
What colour were our team in was it red or royal blue?

Not liking football I think it’s a crime
He didn’t even realise they changed ends at half time

Academic Garry is not
But he uses the skills that he’s got

Garry loves building and knocking things down
Nothing is safe when Garry’s around

When at school he couldn’t count to three
And at the time of exams couldn’t spell GCSE

I taught him his alphabet and how to hold a pen
Two hours later I’d have to show him again

An academic he may not be
But anything practical he’ll always beat me

When in the gutter I got him a job
Back in those days he was a bit of a slob

The Job was with Warrant the place where I work
And his responsibilities he did not sherk

Worked on the docks and did a good job
Promoted to the office and earning a few bob.

Administration work that’s not my brother
When in the office he’ll pass to another

Looking at us both it’s obvious to see
No one in work thinks you’re as young as me

Everyone says it you know that they do
I look at least five years younger than you

Garry’s a dreamer who makes lots of plans
Always trying for money making scams

Building a fish pond or having a toffee stall
A children’s play area he’s tried it all

Recently in the car he had a little bash
It seems into him people like to crash

Not the best driver I can proclaim
But don’t forget where there’s blame there’s a claim

 Many a Hobby you like to do
Camping and fishing to name one or two

When out fishing your greatest catch
Was Lisa of course your perfect match

She is your soul mate and part of your life
And now of course she’s your wonderful wife

Lisa you make a beautiful bride
To be your best man gives me great pride

Garry for you to marry this girl
You are the luckiest man in the world

Lisa looks after you and about you she knows
She also goes out and buys all of your clothes

Lisa thank you for dressing my brother
It used to be the job of our dear mother

If he shopped for himself it may take a while
As everybody knows Garry’s got no style

You live together with your two girls
Emily and Tayla I know they’re your world

Your great family home is typical scouse
Anyone welcome a real open house

A wonderful cook you think you are
I think you take that a little bit far

After Chef College was over and done
All you could do was carve an apple into to a swan

Talking of food you’ve grown your own
On your little patch at your lovely home

So between you the kids and the wife
You could star in the sitcom called The Good Life

Garry this rhyme is meant in jest
Truly as a brother you are the best

I can honestly say and shout out loud
Although your thick I’m still so proud

Garry you’re a good guy and I’m often told
You’d do anything for anyone and have a heart of gold

So work hard, play hard and do your thing
Look after your wife and your wedding ring

You have a great family and a wonderful wife
Now go and enjoy the rest of your life

Some other mentions I must make
before we cut the wedding cake

To Mothers both let’s give a great big shout
for doing their bit and helping you out

Two lovely ladies Barbara and Cathy
For the couple today I’m sure you’re both happy

Father of the bride Arthur You know the score
Arthur is an appropriate name as he’s tall as Dudley Moore

Arthur has done his job and given away the bride
To Garry who is a lucky man this can’t be denied

To the beautiful bridesmaids I must make a toast
From all gathered here including your hosts

Well done to Tayla and Emily too
You both look beautiful in dresses brand new

You make wonderful bridesmaids a great job you’ve done
Enjoy the rest of the day and have lots of fun

Garry thanks for being my brother and best mate
Your choice of best men I thought was great

You had plenty to choose from I know there were more
But you picked the right ones you know the score

Our other best man Ando please give him a cheer
He’s putting on a brave face and showing no fear

I know him better I see his frown
And rumour has it his underpants are brown

Ando please take your time and speak at your leisure
I don’t want to feel any sort of pressure

So please be upstanding everyone in the room
And join me in a toast to the bride and the groom

To a future life shared together
To a marriage that will last forever and ever

TOAST – THE BRIDE AND GROOM!!!!!!!!

If you have enjoyed reading this speech why not take a look at some other examples on the website or consider ordering one yourself for that special occasion?

 

This speech was delivered by Wayne 2nd September 2011
with love and best wishes for your future life together x x

 

A John Deane production in conjunction with Wayne Hartley
www.lost4wordsuk.co.uk